Shut Up And Let Me Talk

This weeks affirmation of intention is I encourage people to have their say. 

In a recent seminar that I conducted there was one member of the audience who was constantly interupting me and anyone else who was contributing. 

There was no ill intention in her action, it was just the way she was….she was one of those people who just had to have something to say and usually it was valid, positive and added to the discussion. 

An annoying habit

Now I’m used to the occasional strange behaviour in audience situations – it just comes with the turf in my line of business, however I could see that for the other audience members, this constant interupting was becoming annoying.

It was fortunate that we were about to discuss ‘buyer behaviour’ and effective communication strategies, as it allowed me to point out that some people seemed to have formed the habit of finishing other people’s statements for them.

This person who had been constantly interrupting, interrupted again and said “I do that all the time” and it cracked the rest of the audience up with laughter.

But it is interesting how we tend to communicate the way we like to communicate and sometimes forgetting that it may not be the way that others like to communicate.

Are you the kind of person that finishes other people’s sentences while they are mid stream in conversation because you have figured out what they want to say and just want to hurry them up?

Are you the kind of person who gets impatient with people who constantly talk ‘big picture’ or ‘blue sky’ where what you’d rather hear and talk about is facts and detail?

Listen for the insignificant

Everyone knows the importance of listening but sometimes we listen, but I know for myself it is a constant and conscious effort to keep focused what people are really saying.

The biggest shift for me in becoming a much better listener was to make a decision to become a better listener.

Now I know that sounds obvious, but the reality is, before you can become a better listener, you have to genuinely want it to be so.  Make the decision, and then follow it up with consciously listening to what people are saying…..and let them say it in their way (trying not to unintentionally force them to say it in a way that you would prefer them to say it).

Another tip is to listen for the insignificant.  What I mean by that is to really tune into the words that people use, and to listen even more intently (and make notes if possible) when they seem to go off on tangents – quite often, it is what people say that you think isn’t important to you that is very important to them.

And in sales, what’s important to our clients needs to be very important to us.

So this week, practice being a better listener – encourage people to have their say…..that’s what I will be working on.

It’s amazing what you can learn when you really listen, and it’s amazing the deeper levels of trust that can be developed when you’re listening with the right intention.

Let me know how you go.